Today I write from a place of utter despair and I cannot shake it off. Lord it feels as though I may lose my mind and that’s a scary place. Some might ask why would you endure such misery, such a let-down; by your so-called God – Where is your God?
Others might assert that I have been speaking words of evangelism for years now and still no visible fruit, and I cannot do anything but concur and also acquiesce that from the outside peering in to my life, it seemingly appears that I must be glutton for some form of medieval punishment or the liken to a Crucifixion – in other words – excruciating inward pain that will not pass from me.
The promise always sounds seductively enticing until you have to drink the cup that also comes with it.
Yet the desire of the promise is just that insatiable and God having been that good to me; and still is, that I still proclaim that “I Want More” and “So What?” if I am about to go crazy, have gone crazy or appear to be crazy to others, as well as to myself.
If I want to reign with Him, I must suffer with Him. All I know is that I want Him with me – more than anything else… That’s where I want to be and to remain; that no matter what I endure in Christ – I am blessed to know that He is with me, and those who trust Him at His Word.
So what? If the promise has been delayed or denied – I will continue to live, move and have my being in Him.
And that folks is how you keep from going crazy and in return remain blessed – give it to God.
Go to God believing that He is and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him – even when all seems to be done in vain. Know Him to be God Almighty and He will show you that He is.